"God measures my worth by the love in my heart, the prayer on my lips, the faith deep within, the hope that never fails, the sufferings patiently endured and offered to God. These are priceless. These make a person worth more than the flowers in the fields, the birds in the air.... What is the treasure my heart really seeks?"
This is one of the snippets from the Lenten prayer book they handed out at church on Ash Wednesday...
Hm... Church... the very place I love to be... the institution, the community which I devoted 3-4 nights a week for almost the last two years.... has turned me away because I am a sinner. It broke my heart - still breaks my heart. And yet, as I said to my mom after it happened six short (but oh-so-long!) days ago, I have been hurt by people using Faith to justify their actions before, and while it is hard not to have a church, a home, a faith community, I have not lost my Faith. I still have unconditional love in my heart. I still have prayer on my lips. I still have faith deep within - deeper than anyone but God could even begin to understand. I am still a person worthy of love, of hope, of joy.
The treasure my heart truly seeks is to be right with God, and I don't feel that my relationship with Him has been compromised at all, if anything, it has been strengthened.
I pray for anyone who has been judged, for anyone who has judged, and for anyone who feels they are less-than-worthy of God's love. God loves you NO MATTER WHAT, as long as you love Him.