I love to write. I have something like six different blogs that I write, four of them quite regulary. I have at least four journals that I am constantly toting around with me and jotting thoughts & notes down, and one is where I dump my entire 'everything'.
This last weekend I thought I'd push myself and lead the closing prayer at youth group... I prep'd, I wrote down notes from the Sunday readings, referenced the Penitential Act (A), and took notes during the homily- so many things were pointing to exactly what message I wanted to share with the kiddos that night! When it came time to speak, I completely froze.
Didn't say a SINGLE thing that I wanted to say!!! Dang it!!! All the wonderful words I'd worked on for almost a week flew right out of my brain! *sad face*
I still trust that something I said was something that somebody in the room needed to hear, because all night I just kept praying that God give me the words to reach people with the message they needed.... but dang. I was sure disappointed in myself. I feel like I'm so much more elloquent when I am writing or typing- even though I don't sit and ponder, I just write, even though I don't go back and edit much of what I'm writing or typing.... when I'm speaking, it still sounds good, but it's not usually what I've practiced on paper.
Still working on the lesson in this.... perhaps my next post will be sharing the words I worked so hard to put together? Perhaps it will reach one of you, my faithful readers....