Saturday, December 2, 2023

The First Sunday of Advent

 December 2nd... Christmas is just 23 days away... are you ready? 

Ha! That's a loaded question!!! Are your cards in the mail? Are your gifts purchased and labeled, is wrapping paper selected and the plan-of-attack set for the Christmas Movie Marathon while you get all the presents wrapped and bows made? Has Santa made his list and checked it twice? Did you make room in your house and your heart for that pregnant, homeless immigrant couple that doesn't have any papers and is asking for a place to stay for just one night? Did you remember to stock your pantry in case the unexpected guest arrives and you need to add another setting or two at the dinner table?

What are you preparing for this holiday?

Just like any other expecting parents, Mary and Joseph did not know when their baby would be coming, not exactly... They didn't know when they would meet Jesus only that they would eventually, finally, get to meet this baby boy, this prophesized King that would change the course of history just by taking his first breath. We don't know when we will get to meet Jesus either. We are told in 1 Corinthians to be vigilant, and to live fully in our Spiritual Gifts as we wait for the revelation of Jesus Christ.... That means don't sit around! Don't save your "best" talents for when you think Jesus (or someone you deem deserving) is present to witness it! The passage continues on by saying God is faithful and we are called to fellowship with Jesus. 

Prepare the way of the Lord. Share your Spiritual Gifts. Find fellowship in your Faith with others who follow God, who find fellowship with Jesus. Prepare your home and your heart and hearth for the Holy Family as they end their weary journey, two undocumented, weary travelers on a donkey, Mary very pregnant and I'm sure Joseph stressed beyond imagination. 

Friday, December 1, 2023

Jesus and Xanax - 2023

 As December starts and reflection of the last year begins, it's been a freaking hard year. So many challenges, so many people dealing with unimaginable tragedies, untimely passing of loved ones, diagnoses of terminal illnesses, life changing events - I can't even begin to lay it all out! Don't get me wrong - there were some AMAZING memories made, lots of friends and family and good times and laughter and love! But there were also some devastating, soul crushing things that came about and are still very, very prevalent.

I got to a point where I found I couldn't really even cry anymore.... I feel the sorrow, the pain, the emotions and actions are still appropriate, but no tears come out. Have I cried myself dry? Were my prayers for compartmentalization and ease in coping with life answered? My friend even gave me one an "emergency xanax"... I keep it in a pill box in my purse, with my other meds, which happens to also be with my rosary. I will probably never take it, as 1)It's not my prescription and 2)I would be terrified of any sort of interaction with my meds.... but it's the thought that counts, for sure! ;-)

The last straw for me, the kick in the teeth, sucker punch in the gut, was finding out that my baby, my 9 year old pitbull Brynleigh, the doggo I adopted at 8 weeks old, has a mast cell tumor.... a mast cell tumor, just like the MCT that led to Stanley's death 10 years ago. On top of everything else that's happened this year, my dog has now been given a terminal ticket. Luckily it is a low-grade tumor, but it still means some big changes.

I did cry some at that.... I do cry.... the pain I felt when Stanley screamed "mamaaaa" and collapsed in my arms, that memory is burned in my memory. The idea of Brynleigh ever getting so sick that it gets to the point where she needs to be put down... Jesus and xanax might just do the trick for me...