A Healing Prayer Through Worship

My mom's cousin - I believe that makes her my second cousin once removed, right? - is dying, she's fought long and hard with the cancer that has infected her body.  She finds comfort in the Lord's Prayer, in this amazing, worship-filled, meditation of the Lord's Prayer.  I really don't have much else to say about it right now, as I am moved by the Spirit to tears every time I read it.... I just need to share it with you all!

A Prayer of Healing through Worship

Heavenly Father,

We come into Your presence to love and adore You.

Thank You for Your love and Your desire for union with us.

We welcome all that You wish to do through

this healing prayer. We open ourselves to communication with You and Jesus through the ministry of the Holy Spirit. Come Holy Spirit, anoint us with healing so deep it reaches back into our blood line; with

healing so wide it impacts our friends and relatives;

with healing so high it draws us into Your holiness.

Holy Spirit, come with Your fire.

Our Father Which Art In Heaven---

Father God,

by Your grace I come to You with all that I am

and all that I ever hope to be.

I am Your child born of Your love.

Jesus brought me into Your presence.

You alone satisfy my soul.

You in me and I in You;

this is the path of healing for my soul.

By Your grace I come into Your presence

with simple, trusting assurance, certain

of Your love for me. In Your presence all

fear and insecurity melt away and deep hurts

become healing memories. In Your presence

I am strengthened and filled with hope. Father

in heaven, I breathe the breath of heaven

deep inside my spirit. Your heaven flows

through me. May the light of Your glory be

present with me throughout this day.

I love You Father.

Hallowed Be Thy Name---

Father,

I choose to live this one precious life in a

way that honors Your holy name. You call me

to worship, and I come. Oh Father, let all

that is within me cry holy. Let every wound

of my past dissolve in the light of Your

wonderful presence. Turn my weaknesses into

strengths, my failures into victories, my sorrows

into joy. Perfect all that concerns me as I

gaze upon Your holiness.

Thy Kingdom Come---

Father,

Your kingdom of love is in my heart.

It is not I who live but Christ who lives

in me. I am identified with my risen Lord

Jesus and Your kingdom is established in my

spirit. In coming to know Jesus, I am

discovering who I am, Precious Lord. Your

kingdom has come into my emotions,

and they are in a healthy balance.

Your kingdom has come into my mind,

and it is sanctified. Your kingdom

has come into my body, and I am becoming

healthy. Your kingdom rules my heart, and

I live a life of richness and depth. Your

kingdom has come into my mouth, and I speak

words that heal and liberate. Because Your

kingdom rules my life I am resilient and

filled with hope in all circumstances.

Thy Will Be Done---

Father in heaven,

unite my will with that of Your son.

Thank You for giving me a spirit of

submission, tender and open to the

Holy Spirit. In every circumstance I

commend myself to Your grace and choose

what is pleasing to You. Father,

I delight to do Your will. When I

lay my life before You and say "Thy

will be done," You receive it

as an act of worship. Wonderful Lord,

You have come tenderly into the deepest

struggles of my life and whispered, "Just

keep your eyes on Me. Trust Me to take

care of you." You have come into my

broken heart and made it a place of worship.

You have drawn me to praise You when

everything in my world was in ashes.

You have called me to trust beyond all

reason. I lay my life upon the altar of

Your love and say with joy in my soul,

"Thy will be done." Jesus, I trust in You.

On Earth As It Is In Heaven---

Father,

my heart beats with Your heart

for me to live in Christ.

Thank You, Holy Spirit,

for bringing my life into harmony

with heaven. Thank You, Holy Spirit,

for teaching me how to walk with

Jesus in His resurrected life. Thank

You, that the attitudes of heaven

are my attitudes. I think Your

thoughts and walk in Your presence.

I carry the light of Heaven wherever I go.

Give Us This Day Our Daily Bread---

Father,

you have always taken care of me, and

You always will. You give me what

I need each day and prepare for my

tomorrow. My faith is growing. Thank

You for my daily joy that draws me

to worship when sadness comes. Thank

You for Your healing balm that soothes

the day's aches and pains. Thank

You for Your perfect love that soaks

away my fear. Your tender daily

care in every area of need draws me

to my knees in worship. Thank You

for walking with me day by day.

In our growing friendship You have

never failed me, ever. I love You,

Father. I love You, Jesus, Bread

of Heaven. I love You, Holy Spirit.

Forgive Us Our Debts---

Father,

thank You for Your gift of mercy in my life;

Your mercy that reaches my heart, because I have

forgiven those who hurt me. I confess my sins and

receive forgiveness. I am free from condemnation

and safely united to You. Your truth has made me free.

I love You Father.

As We Forgive Our Debtors---

Father,

by the grace of the cross I let go of

bitterness resentment and unforgiveness.

If there are hidden roots of unforgiveness,

thank You for shining Your light on them.

I entrust this area to You. Thank You, for

turning injury into compassion and hurts

into intercessions. Forgiveness brings

heaven to earth. I love You, Father---

And Lead Us Not Into Temptation---

Thank You, Father,

for keeping me on a path that leads to holiness.

With Your grace I see temptation when it comes,

and brush it off the path. Your love is stronger

than the urge to sin. Thank You for healing any

areas of my soul that might be vulnerable to temptation.

Jesus, You are my Shepherd and my hiding place. You

guide me to safe pastures. I am responsive to the

voice of the Holy Spirit who warns me of trouble ahead.

Thank You, Father. I Love You.

But Deliver Us From Evil---

Father,

Thank You for protecting me from every evil and for

bringing me a gift of peace. You have broken the chain

of oppression, delivered me from depression, anger, guilt,

and fear. At the name of Jesus every knee shall bow;

addictions, perversions, hopelessness, worthlessness,

loneliness and despair must bend their knee to the

name of Jesus. I cast down every argument and every

high thing in me that exalts itself against the

knowledge of God. I bring every thought into captivity

to the obedience of Christ. Thank You for giving me

the power over all the power of the enemy. Nothing

shall hurt me. You have given me a spirit of praise

and worship, which is my strength in the face of the

enemy. Thank You for Your armor, Your name, Your blood,

Your Spirit. No weapon formed against me shall prosper.

Thank You Father. I love You.

For Thine Is The Kingdom.. And The Power.. And The Glory Forever

Father,

every gift You have given me, every dream, every talent,

every possession, every resource and hope for the future,

I return to You with love. All is Yours.

May Your name be glorified, may Your kingdom come.

Take Lord, receive, All my liberty, My memory,

my understanding, my entire will. All that I have

and possess. You have given all to me; To You,

O' Lord, I return it. All is Yours. Dispose of it

wholly according to You will. Give me Your love

and Your grace, for this is sufficient for me.

Amen!!

Psalm 34:18

As the holidays are drawing near, I am even more painfully aware that I am single and working on the "getting out there" part of post-break up-life. 

It's hard.  It sucks.  I have gone back to church a few times, my old church, the mass where I felt my faith-community was, but it's not the same.... I feel like I've got a scarlet letter on my chest, like I've grown horns at my temples, and from some people, I most definitely feel the proverbial cold shoulder. 

Don't get me wrong, others have welcomed me back with incredibly open arms and hearts that needed healing, both theirs and mine, and it was absolutely wonderful... but I still feel like I no longer belong. 

Today's verse of the day is Psalm 34:18 "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." 

I don't necessarily feel entirely broken hearted, but there are pieces and parts of my heart that are certainly and indefinitely broken.  I don't feel like my soul is decemated, but there are corners that still need to be held, comforted, and nurtured back to its fullest state of being.  Not only regarding people from church, but other people in my circle of friends.  And I know, I know in my heart of hearts, that they're hurt by some of the happenings over the last 12 months, and it is a time for all of us to learn together, how to comfort one another, heal and move forward.   Knowing God is holding me close, even the tiny broken bits of heart & soul that I hide from everyone but myself, helps me to take that next step...

On Hallowed Ground

Sometimes I need to unplug, back out of the busy-ness around me, and just be in silence.  That's not easy to do in today's world, let me tell ya!!!

The other day I thought I'd managed to escape the insanity as I sat at the little pho restaurant by my office, but nope... in walked some pretty loud customers and out walked my peace of mind.  I tried losing myself in my book again (on my kindle -shhh! don't tell!) but it was a futile effort.

Wednesday was another one of those days where I just needed to be.  Silent.  No chance of being bothered by anyone.  I was feeling the Spirit call to me, and I just needed to listen.  I needed more than just the silence of my car in the parking lot.  I needed to just find Peace.  Quiet.  God. 

I found myself at the local cemetary.  It was a beautiful, warm Fall day, the sun was out, the wind was tickling the branches of the trees that stood watch over the 100 year old head stones, and it was perfect.  Absolutely perfect.  Stepping foot on hallowed ground, I swear I could feel the Spirit fill me from my feet up to the top of my head.  I righted some of the flags and flower pots that had been toppled over by wind, and brushed off piles of leaves from the headstones, saying a little prayer for each person as I walked by. 

God didn't tell me any deep secrets or bless me with any profound epiphanies.  He didn't solve world hunger or give me the healing touch to cure all cancer.  He was just present.  With me.  In peaceful silence.  It was so humbling, so fulfilling, so.... *sigh* perfect. 

I promise you, cemetaries are not always creepy.  I encourage you to spend some time in one.  (I know that sounds creepy, but I promise, it's not)

"For God alone, oh my soul, wait in silence, for my hope is from Him." ~Proverbs 62:5

My "Soul Rehab" Playlist

Here it is!  It's been put together for a bit, but I kept forgetting to bring the journal page that had it... Sorry, no hyperlinks just yet...

I Can Only Imagine, Mercy Me
Take My Hand, The Kry
Lord, I Need You, Matt Maher
Beautiful, Mercy Me
Only Grace, Matthew West
There is a Way, Newworldson
Help Me Find It, Sidewalk Prophets
Worn, Tenth Avenue North
Redeemed, Big Daddy Weave
Need You Now, Plumb
Forgiveness, Matthew West
Carry Me, Josh Wilson
I will Rise, Chris Tomlin
He Won't Let You Go, The Kry

There are, quite obviously, SOOO many more songs that could go on this list, oh, the healing power of music!!! 

What songs help get you over that "hump" when all else seems to fail?

Filling a Void

I found this post from about two months ago - for some reason it didn't get posted..... it was the idea of the first step to my post I just published, "When in Doubt...."

---

A few months ago I posted about my God-shaped hole not really being God-shaped so much as being St. Stephen's-shaped.... There's no way I could have ever known that, 5 months later, I'd have a boyfriend-shaped hole too.

Right now I'm not sure that I'm ready to jump back into the full-on church commitments again, I don't even know if they'd ask me back.... I think I need some time to just be me, but I do want to start filling that void- where my love-lost used to be, where my St Stephen's community used to be. And how will I do that? Well, since it's not really realistic to just unplug and disappear for a week, I'm thinking I might hang out with Jesus for a few hours here and there...

"When in Doubt, Go Where There's None"

That was my facebook comment when I checked in at church yesterday, and it was exactly where I needed to be.

I'd been avoiding going back to church, really, since I was asked to leave music ministry, 02/15/2013 - Ash Wednesday, and especially after leaving my ex-boyfriend.  It's been just too painful.  I went to church on Easter, but not my church.  I went a few times to other types of services, but not my church's services.  But yesterday I was moved by both good & bad things to just hit that "RESET" button and start all over. 

I found myself at St Stephen's about 30 minutes early for Mass, so I shared in some adoration (and tears) before mass.  It felt so right, being there, present with the Body of Christ- figuratively as the other members of the Faith Community sat down, and literally, with the Host on the altar.  The gospel message was perfect for what I needed to hear.... IMAGINE THAT! *soft grin*  God?  Speaking to me?  That's never happened to me before! (note-sarcasm! He talks to me all the time!)

Every one of us suffers, but what do we do with it?  We bring it to God.  We know Jesus is there with us.  We go to church.  We feel Him.  He doesn't "fix" it, but He helps us heal from it, and we do not have to do it alone.

Wise words for this aching soul.

One (or two or 20?) Midnight(s) Gone!

Just a little play-on-words from one of my favorite modern operas Into the Woods.... I can't believe it's been almost a month since my last post.  Not for a lack of brainstorming, just for a lack of making the time.  I've been putting together a playlist that I cannot wait to share with you, but I want to wait until I have all the right YouTube links and whatnot so you can share the music with me without having to go back and forth between windows or tabs - you can just click and enjoy. 


Please stay tuned! (Pun intended) :-)