Breath of Heaven (I found this post in my "drafts"- somehow it wasn't published?!)

(This blog entry was started back in December 2010, when I was still in choir, when I was singing the solo as Mary for the song Breath of Heaven.  Sadly, we had to cancel the concert, and due to the severity of my cat allergies and how many choir members had cats, I had to make the difficult decision to leave Songs of Sonoro)

Mary really had to trust, a lot.  Blindly.  Wow.  I've written about how Mary's "Yes" led her down her path, and how my "Yes" led me to Norway... hardly the same, but for me, it was still a huge risk. 

But I digress....

The lyrics to Breath of Heaven are written in the first person, Mary wondering if what she's done was the right choice, if her "Yes" was the answer she should have given.  I don't know, maybe it has something to do with me being raised and most comfortable as a Roman Catholic Woman of Faith, but I really do identify with Mary. Not to say- not at all- that I think I'm like her, but more that she is a role model, a hero-if you will, to look up to. She had to have the ultimate Faith.  Does this mean that, in scripture, it shows where Mary doubted God?  I can't answer that- sadly, I'm not that well versed.  What it does mean to me is that it's okay to have moments of doubt.  God still leads you down your path, you can still have Faith that He will do that for you, even as you doubt that you're going the right direction. 

It wasn't until I was practicing for the solo, embracing the words, the meaning, becoming the "voice" in the piece, that it really dawned on me... My doubts in Faith, no matter how incredibly trivial they seemed, were okay.  I mean- if Mary could doubt God's plan, then surely it was okay that I did, right?  As long as I find my voice and say "Yes." 

Faith in the 21st Century

We often don't realize how today's culture influences our knowledge and understanding of things, especially for children.  Here's the conversation I overheard while browsing around the Catholic book store in my town

Boy, "Daddy, who do you like better- God or Jesus?"

Father, "Well, I like them both the same."

Boy, "No, Dad.  You have to pick one!"

Father, "No, son, see- it's like God is inside of Jesus."

Boy, "Oh.  Why did Jesus eat God?"

Father, "No, no, no.  It's more like God and Jesus are the same."

Boy, "Oh.  Okay.  (pause)  Dad?  Why do they have fairies with Jesus?"

Father, "What?!  Oh- those aren't fairies, son, those are angels."

Boy, "Noooo.  Blue Angels are airplanes.  These are blue fairies."

Father, "No, the Blue Angels are blue planes that are nick-named 'angels'.  These statues are of actual angels wearing blue robes, with Jesus."

Boy, "Oh.  Okay."

It was so precious, I smiled right down to my soul and said to myself, "I miss kids' logic."  I was in the elementary schools for a while when I was still a school-of-ed major in college, and it was so refreshing and entertaining to listen to how kids processed the everyday stuff we take in and take for granted! 

Prayers for Norway

Oslo was rocked by multiple bombings and a tragic shooting today.  Please, pray for everyone affected.  I visited there for Holy Week last year, and it was such a beautiful, peace-filled, accepting country... One of my friends there said it's the worst tragedy that's happened there since WWII.  My heart aches for them. 

Lord, please keep the people of Norway close to you in this time of terrible tragedy.  Let them to feel Your presence and comfort as You dry their tears and calm their hearts.  Amen.

International Fellowship

I've been checking out my stats in the blogging world lately, and was incredibly delighted to see that people all over the world have been hopefully inspired by what I've shared over the last 2 years!  So- who's been reading? 

In no specific order: US, Russia, China, Japan, Ukraine, Georgia, UK, Thailand, German, and Iran!  The darker the green, the more hits on the website.  I only wish that more people would comment.  I would hope that this can be a place for open conversation about faith-based discussions. 

While you're here, please say a prayer for a friend of mine who is struggling with a life of vocation. 

A prayer for vocation:

Almighty Father,

You send the gift of Your Holy Spirit

for the building of Your Kingdom.

With the help of this Spirit,

Give us the grace to listen to Your call in our lives.

Give us strength & courage to do Your will.

Grant us wisdom & humility to choose Your way

even when we find it most difficult.

Lord, bless all the faithful in Your church

who are seeking holiness,

But in a special way,

watch over priests, borthers, & sisters.

Help them to give their lives in joyful service

that they may be signs of Your presence among us.

We beg you, Father,

to fill our hearts with a burning desire to follow Jesus.

May there be many who offer their lives

for the service of Your church,

that all may come to know and love You.

We ask this through Christ our Lord,

Amen.

♪♫ Oh Lord, Hear My Prayer ♫♪

*giggle* Aren't the music notes delightful?  Really- it's the little things in life, like key-shortcut combos. ☺

There are three songs I remember from the Taize prayers in Tower Chapel at PLU.  The one that I find myself singing the most is this:

Oh Lord, hear my prayer,
Oh Lord, hear my prayer,
When I call, answer me.
Oh Lord, hear my prayer,
Oh Lord, hear my prayer,
Come and listen to me.

It is so comforting- Taize, this meditation melody, all of the above!  I close my eyes and imagine one candle in the center of my heart, and that candle spreading light through out my entire body until it radiates through my entire being... *speechless grin* 

I wish there was a way I could share that feeling of balance, focus, Agape; the presence of God's love is so amazing in those moments.  I've been yearning for it more and more, and unfortunately find it harder and harder to encounter lately.  (Mostly because my 75 lb dog crawls onto my lap and starts licking my face as soon as I sit down.)  I use my daily commute to talk to God- it's not ideal, as I have to split my attention with God so I can pay attention to traffic... Yay! for multitasking!!  A lot of times I will either start or end with that song... in my head, I hear the harmonies that go with the melody, and I like to think that it's my guardian angel singing with me, helping to intercede. 

I will close today's blog with another song I sing a lot, also from the Taize meditations.  The melody doesn't actually resolve, and I kinda like it that way because it's like an open invitation for God to come and live within:

Take, oh take me as I am.
Summon all that I can be.
Set Your seal upon my heart
and live in me.

Fill in the Blank.

On my way in to work today I found myself listening to Sacred Heart Radio again.  It was Sisters in Christ talking about our relationships with Jesus, and a car drove by with about 13 various Christian bumper-stickers.  The one that stuck out the most was a little black rectangle that had white font & said :

Jesus is _______.

It was perfect timing, as one of the sisters was saying what her relationship was with Jesus, what it meant to have different kinds of relationships with Our Lord, and that sort of thing. 

What's the first thing that comes to your mind when you see that bumper-sticker?  What's the first word that comes to your mind?  For me, it was "cool".  I know, how very 7th grade, right?!  I guess my heart must be communing with Him as a brother, a friend.  Next word, of course, was "amazing."  AMEN!  How true is that?!  We might not always keep a present thought on God's son, but He's always with us, always thinking about us, just waiting for us to say "Hey there, wanna come play?" 

I don't have tons of time right now, but it's one of my goals to keep up the good posts.  Please, share your thoughts!

Tid-bits of Inspiration (title track)

Since my junior year of college, I've been thinking about writing a book of some sort.  I've bounced around some different ideas and concepts, and have some brainstorming word-documents I've transferred from one computer to another with every upgrade.  My brother got me a great book Putting Your Passion into Print, and I've been working my way through that book- it's written pretty well, two points for my lil' bro! 

It hit me today while I was driving in to work while listening to EWTN.  Not sure how or why the inspiration hit me while I was on the freeway, but it did. 

I have 2 composition notebooks, a lovely stack of post-it's, and some of my favorite pens.  *grin*  Now, I'm just waiting for tid-bits of inspiration to start rolling downhill! 

Is there anything you'd like to read about, something I've talked about in my blogs on which I should follow up? 

I fixed my blogger settings so I'm now notified when you comment!  My sincerest apologies that it took me over 2 years to find your last comments.