The First Sunday of Advent

 December 2nd... Christmas is just 23 days away... are you ready? 

Ha! That's a loaded question!!! Are your cards in the mail? Are your gifts purchased and labeled, is wrapping paper selected and the plan-of-attack set for the Christmas Movie Marathon while you get all the presents wrapped and bows made? Has Santa made his list and checked it twice? Did you make room in your house and your heart for that pregnant, homeless immigrant couple that doesn't have any papers and is asking for a place to stay for just one night? Did you remember to stock your pantry in case the unexpected guest arrives and you need to add another setting or two at the dinner table?

What are you preparing for this holiday?

Just like any other expecting parents, Mary and Joseph did not know when their baby would be coming, not exactly... They didn't know when they would meet Jesus only that they would eventually, finally, get to meet this baby boy, this prophesized King that would change the course of history just by taking his first breath. We don't know when we will get to meet Jesus either. We are told in 1 Corinthians to be vigilant, and to live fully in our Spiritual Gifts as we wait for the revelation of Jesus Christ.... That means don't sit around! Don't save your "best" talents for when you think Jesus (or someone you deem deserving) is present to witness it! The passage continues on by saying God is faithful and we are called to fellowship with Jesus. 

Prepare the way of the Lord. Share your Spiritual Gifts. Find fellowship in your Faith with others who follow God, who find fellowship with Jesus. Prepare your home and your heart and hearth for the Holy Family as they end their weary journey, two undocumented, weary travelers on a donkey, Mary very pregnant and I'm sure Joseph stressed beyond imagination. 

Jesus and Xanax - 2023

 As December starts and reflection of the last year begins, it's been a freaking hard year. So many challenges, so many people dealing with unimaginable tragedies, untimely passing of loved ones, diagnoses of terminal illnesses, life changing events - I can't even begin to lay it all out! Don't get me wrong - there were some AMAZING memories made, lots of friends and family and good times and laughter and love! But there were also some devastating, soul crushing things that came about and are still very, very prevalent.

I got to a point where I found I couldn't really even cry anymore.... I feel the sorrow, the pain, the emotions and actions are still appropriate, but no tears come out. Have I cried myself dry? Were my prayers for compartmentalization and ease in coping with life answered? My friend even gave me one an "emergency xanax"... I keep it in a pill box in my purse, with my other meds, which happens to also be with my rosary. I will probably never take it, as 1)It's not my prescription and 2)I would be terrified of any sort of interaction with my meds.... but it's the thought that counts, for sure! ;-)

The last straw for me, the kick in the teeth, sucker punch in the gut, was finding out that my baby, my 9 year old pitbull Brynleigh, the doggo I adopted at 8 weeks old, has a mast cell tumor.... a mast cell tumor, just like the MCT that led to Stanley's death 10 years ago. On top of everything else that's happened this year, my dog has now been given a terminal ticket. Luckily it is a low-grade tumor, but it still means some big changes.

I did cry some at that.... I do cry.... the pain I felt when Stanley screamed "mamaaaa" and collapsed in my arms, that memory is burned in my memory. The idea of Brynleigh ever getting so sick that it gets to the point where she needs to be put down... Jesus and xanax might just do the trick for me... 

Love is All Around

 

1 John 4:12 says No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and His love is made complete in us. 

As I got out of the car today, this little heart was sharing the parking spot with me. 💓 It made me stop and smile. I almost picked it up, but instead left it there, thinking that it may make the next person smile too. 

We get going so fast these days, buzzing around from place to place, picking up kids, groceries, medications, dropping things off, making the next deadline; we get frustrated so easily, yelling at cars who are going to slow, going to fast, in our way... this little heart reminded me that I need to stop and grant people grace, love, and kindness. They may be having a harder day than I am, no matter how hard I think my day has been, and they made need to see God's presence more than I need to be 17 seconds earlier to my next destination. 

Remember - you may be someone's only exposure to God's love. Think about that. You may be the only person in their world who offers them a smile, a word of kindness, or the time of day. Try to remember that. Spread kindness, spread joy, spread Love. 

Is "Good" Good Enough?

How do you make the decision between right and wrong? One would think it's easy, you do what feels good, what makes it easier to sleep at night, what doesn't weigh heavy on your conscience... But it's not always black and white. 

When you are faced with decisions that need to be made, do you choose "good" or "good enough"? Do you choose from which is bad over which could have been worse? People say "The Devil's in the details" and I don't think we ever realize how true that statement is! Temptation is around us all day, every day, and so many times we justify it with saying our decisions were "good enough" to be considered "good". 

Father Davis said in his homily last Sunday, that during Lent, we are meant to give much more time and focus on prayer, penance, and the effective use of the Word of God. The Holy Spirit helps to guide us to the path we need to be on, the path we should be taking. If we are truly listening with our hearts and not our minds, we will hear Jesus calling us by name, just as He promised us He would. 

I LOVE THIS! For me, this means listening in the silence.... God speaks the loudest when the rest of the world is hushed.... no TV, no phones, no music, no outside noises, sometimes I will put my headphones in and use them like earplugs - no sound on at all, just have it muting the world around me so I can listen to the silence. These are the moments of reflection, of direction, and divine communication, for me - what works for you? 

I challenge you, as we go forward on our Lenten journey this year, to make a habit of finding just 5 minutes of silence each day, and listen. Then, really think about the last time you chose the Right. The Good, not the good enough. Stare at that door, and really, truly make sure you are ready to open it.... listen for Jesus calling your name, I have faith that He will. 

Fasting from your Addictions

 So many people focus on fasting and giving things up, sacrificing things during Lent…. A lot of times they even make a big deal about it. It actually says, in the bible, NOT to talk about it. To bathe, get dressed, make yourself look presentable, and don’t let others see how you suffer.

But today, many of my claimants talked about their journey to becoming clean and sober. How their fasting from their addictions helped them turn their lives around, and how they have been able to see the changes, the differences in where they were, what led them down that path, and where they are now. 

I believe there are appropriate times to talk about what we have and haven’t given up. Our addictions, whether we are ready to acknowledge them or not, hurt so many people - soooo many more people than we may ever realize. Six degrees of separation doesn’t even begin to cover the trickle-down effect of how our actions, inactions, and reactions impact the lives of others. 

On this first Friday of Lent, let’s think about what we truly should be fasting from, and whether or not we should choose to share it. 

Let the Fasting Begin!

 What is Lent really about? Is it about what we give up for the 40-some days to honor (or grumble) every day that Christ suffered in the desert, resisting the temptations while in the desert? 

Last night, Father spoke about how Lent is the invitation to Christianity's Annual 40 Day Retreat! You get to leave your everyday life behind, take a step back from what plagues you on a regular basis, re-evaluate, trim your "spiritual fat" and make some changes for the better! 

Today was an absolutely emotionally and mentally exhausting day, but I do have more that I'd like to reflect on and share. Please, I know it's been a loooong writing hiatus, but hold me to writing here more, okay? 

See you soon, I promise! 

Here's the Thing - Nobody Wins.

Right now, I should be in Texas, helping. Right now, I'm not. Right now, the governor of Texas is fighting with the federal government about who has the right to do what; about who has jurisdicition to say what should and shouldn't be done with 17,000 minor children who came to this country seeking saftey, seeking refuge. Right now, it's back to business as usual here for me, with my appointments and my phone calls, singing for weddings, singing at church, and walking my miles every day. Right now, I struggle with the fact that I'm back in my "first world" status, my white privilaged routine, where I can't deny the fact that I have luxuries afforded to me that are above and beyond what are necessary for every day existence. Right now, all I can do is pray. Pray that someone, somewhere recognizes what is *right* and what needs to happen for those SEVENTEEN THOUSAND children who are still in custody, without families, without support, without homes. Pray that somehow I find peace of mind, heart, and soul with the fact that I was just days away from being able to help and it remains just out of my grasp, beyond my control. Pray that the Holy Spirit is with every single one of those souls involved, children and workers alike, helping them to cope and find their way out of the darkness that they fight every single day that they remain in their situation. Until there are NO MORE children in custody, until this is no longer a political game, nobody wins.